One month down, a lifetime to go.
I can’t believe Little Man is already 5 weeks old! Where has the time gone? I’ve learned a lot of things during my first month as a Mom. It’s hard, but I can do it. Some days Sawyer refuses to nap, some days Bennett drives me absolutely crazy (baby+puppy=losing my mind), some days my husband works for 12 hours and I’m ready to pull my hair out by the time he gets home, and so is he!
But every night when we settle into bed (baby, puppy, and all), I’m so grateful for my little family. I’ve learned how to balance things as best I can. I’ve learned it’s okay to se him down and let him cry while I take a 2 minute shower or grab something to eat. I’ve learned how important it is to take care of myself for Sawyer’s sake. If I don’t drink enough water or eat enough calories then I won’t produce enough milk for my baby to eat. But I’ve also learned to put myself second or even third when it comes to the needs of my family. I’ve learned to accept help even when I don’t want to. I have the mentality that I can deny myself and handle it all, but sometimes I really need a nap, or someone to help me with the laundry, or cook us a meal, and as long as my loved ones are still offering, I need to take them up on it!
Sawyer grows before my eyes each and every day! His newborn outfits get a little tighter on him every day and I may or may not have cried when I realized he was almost too big for my favorite outfit yesterday. He loves bath time, his Mamaroo, begin worn in the Moby Wrap, his car seat, and being swaddled. He has an almost insatiable appetite and eats like it’s his job. Breastfeeding was hard at first, but we’ve gotten the hang of it with the help of a nipple shield (TMI?), and now we’re going strong.
He hates diaper changes, taking naps, being cold, and spitting up. He’s a relatively easy baby except when it comes to nap time. He falls asleep best in my arms (after a few minutes of intensely fighting it, no matter how tired he is), and then transferring him to his bassinet or his mamaroo or wherever I want to set him down is the real challenge. And if he’s not swaddled he will easily flail and wake himself up and start screaming. It’s great. We try to lay him down when he’s drowsy so he can learn to put himself to sleep. It works sometimes.
However, he sleeps at night like a champ! We’ve been using the Baby Wise method and keeping him on a schedule, as best we can. He sleeps 5-7 hour stretches through the night, wakes up once to eat, and then will go down again for another 3-4 hours. He still has his off nights where we’re both up all night but they’re becoming few and far between. We hope to have him sleeping all the way through the night soon!
As for me, I’m doing okay. There’s no way to fully prepare yourself for life postpartum, and with my recovery on top of that it hit me like a ton of bricks. I never really got the “baby blues” and for that I’m grateful, but there were a few days where my symptoms were really bad and I was really scared that something was wrong. I fell into kind of a deep funk then, but I went to the doctor and got everything checked out and my blood pressure was actually down! After that my mood drastically improved since I wasn’t worried anymore.
And sure, there are days when I get lonely or go stir crazy being cooped up in the house with a crying baby and hyper dog by myself all day. Kurtis’ car broke down last week and he’s been using mine to get to work so I am quite literally stuck at home until his gets fixed! Some days it’s hard, but my family is close by and I know it’s not forever.
I’m 35 lbs down since delivery and still have 11 more to go to get back to pre-baby weight. I haven’t been doing anything since I need to be cleared by my doctor before I’m allowed to exercise and I have been eating whatever is easy and available to me (what I can make and eat with one hand with a crying baby in the other). I know the first 35 lbs just fell of with delivery, and breastfeeding, and my swelling going down. The last 11 lbs I’ll probably really have to work for! But as I feel stronger each day, I’m excited to be more active once I get cleared!
Month One is done and in the books! While I’m sad to see my squishy newborn look more and more like a real baby every day, I’m excited to hit more milestones in his life.